An Interview with Naomi Wolff from A Wolff in the Family by Francine Falk-Allen

Interviewer: We’re here today with Naomi Wolff, whose exciting western American life was full of twists and turns, especially during the Depression. Naomi, what would you like us to know about yourself?

Naomi: Omigosh. My life exciting? I hardly think so! I just did whatever had to be done, puttin’ one foot in front of the other. I was born in Kansas, lived on farms a lot, except when I was livin’ in Ogden with my husband and family for… lessee, about eighteen years. I have been a mother most of my life. So most folks know how that sure takes up your time. It’s not like you get to do much else.

I: To start with, then, how did you meet your husband and what was it like marrying him?

N: I met Frank at a dance in Kansas City. If me and my family went anywhere at all, off the farm, we went to the little bitty town of Turner to buy feed and supplies, or we went to Kansas City for a day sometimes. Now, Frank was not really much of a dancer, but I think he went to these dances to see if he could meet a pretty girl! And I guess that’s what he did.

I: I can see you’ve always had a pretty face.

N: Well, I never had much time to fuss about my appearance. But Frank told me I had a nice face and I heard that from other people. It’s probably on the verge of sinful to brag, so I won’t say any more about that. Frank courted me a bit and then asked me to marry him pretty early on. He was handsome and had a good job with the railroad, so I thought, this is prob’ly as good as I’m gonna get around here and I said yes. I was eighteen and we married in early 1908. I think I loved him and I thought he loved me too.

Now, Frank was a little different once we got married. We were always amorous, if you know what I mean, when he come home from the rails. But he could be… whaddaya call it? Stern, I think. And given he was bringin’ home the bacon, he expected things a certain way… he wanted the kids quiet and his dinner at 6:00. I knew that was my job so I did things how he liked. Mostly.

I: How many children did you have?

N: Ha! A whole lot of ‘em. I had my firstborn, Frances (she was named after her daddy; his name was Frank Joseph and we named her Frances Josephine)…  Frances was born in November, 1908. And after that, I had eleven more, plus stillborn twins. That was a sad month for us. And then later on another one after those twelve; she was a surprise. 

I: How did you manage a houseful like that? 

N: Oh, I knew how to stretch a dollar real far. Plus we grew vegetables and berries… But with that many kids sometimes you gotta use a yardstick on ‘em, else they run roughshod. I never liked doin’ that but you got to. And Frances started helping me early on, as soon as she could fold a diaper or wash a dish. Anita was next, so I was lucky to have girls as my two oldest so they could help with the housework, the cooking, and taking care of the kids who were younger. Frances, I think she resented it a little…

I: How was your relationship with your children?

N: My relationship? I’m not sure what you mean. Did I love them? Of course I did! If you mean did we get along or were we close… well, Frances was her daddy’s girl. He was real attached to her. And since I was the one left home alone, I was the one who had to teach her right from wrong and tell her no. It wasn’t easy for me to see Frank pay more attention to Frances, either. But Anita and I, we were close. She didn’t always get along with her dad and she and Frances, bein’ so close in age, only a year apart, they butt heads a lot too.

My other kids… well, sometimes they maybe didn’t get enough attention. I loved ‘em so much, but things happened in the middle of my life that not everybody understood. So there came a time when I think some of the kids didn’t like me too much. But their dad was no saint. Lot of things he did, not all of ‘em knew about. He was gone so much… that was hard for me. 

I: Did you know Francine, who wrote this book about you?

N: Oh, for heaven’s sake. I can’t imagine why anyone would write a book about me. I’m just a mother from the country, like my mother was. But no, I never met Francine. I knew about her but my husband had died so I didn’t have a way to drive out to California to see her when she was born. I met her big sister and brother though; we went out there one time. I got to see a lot of my kids and grandkids. That was a real good time for me… prob’ly around 1941 or’42.

I: Do you want to tell me about the things that happened that people didn’t understand? 

N: Oh, no, I’d rather not. If Francine told that story, well, I just hope she told it fair. Frank… he had kind of a mean streak. He put our youngest kids in an orphanage… and I’ll just let people read the book to see why that happened. I have a few regrets in my life but mostly I think things turned out just the way God wanted. You don’t always know in your life how the cookie’s gonna crumble. We had a real hard time around 1929 but things got better.

I: That was the start of the Depression. I’m sure that was mostly what caused the strife in your life.

N: Ha! You might think. But there’s a whole lot more happened that had nothin’ to do with money or the Depression. Nothin’ at all. No, I didn’t have a whole lotta choices in my life, but I made one, changed my life, and the lives of a lotta other people. I guess that’s the story here. Yes, that would be a story worth tellin.’

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FRANCINE FALK-ALLEN grew up in northern California, where she still lives. She had polio in 1951 and has lived her life as a disabled person efforting to be a “normie.” 

Falk-Allen was originally an art major and later completed her BA in Managerial Accounting, running her own business for over thirty years. She has always sought creative outlets, such as painting, singing, and writing.

She began doing extensive family genealogy research in 1999, and has traced both her maternal and paternal ancestors back to the 1600’s. 

Her two books, Not a Poster Child: Living Well with a Disability—A Memoir  and No Spring Chicken: Stories and Advice from a Wild Handicapper on Aging, and Disability, have received the Kirkus star for excellence and won other awards.

Her third book is A Wolff in the Family, a riveting early twentieth century saga set in the western United States and based on scandalous family history.

Francine facilitates a writing group and volunteers on her town’s Americans with Disabilities Act Accessibility Committee. She loves the outdoors, swimming, gardening, movies, well-written literature, being with friends and sharing British tea and a little champagne now and then. She resides in San Rafael, California, with her husband, Richard Falk.